Good afternoon loves, I hope we’re all doing well.
My tale brings me here today, because I am an idiot. This is completely my fault, but I thought it would be funny to post and make somebodies day brighter.
So, for background, I had been at school all day. I am a college kid majoring in history and education, my brain was literally fried. In the mornings, I don’t really think about what I am going to wear for school, because I assume I am going straight home and passing out cold on my bed.
Well, on this day, I put on a red shirt and skinny jeans, as well as converses. My hair was up in a high pony tale, and I was off to school. After 8 hours of being in class, forcing myself to stay awake in class, read novel after novel of historical bibliographies, my mom texted me asking if I could stop by a store that had a big red logo, that has a target on it, that is known for it’s employees wearing red shirts, and pick up my little brother a big post board, some markers, as well as some store bought cupcakes. She had no time to go due to being in meetings and a lot more going on. Turned out my little brother forgot to tell her he had a major project due and needed a poster board, markers, and cupcakes. She said she would pay me back when I got to her house, I said of course! Anything for my mom right?!
Well, after my last class and giving a major presentation, I was completely friggin exhausted. Not sure how I drove, but I did.
I got to the big store known for it’s red logo, parked my car, got out of my car and walked right up to the doors.
I then realized I was wearing a red shirt and looked like an employee. I had no hoodie, I had nothing to cover my shirt up with.
I was fucked.
I decided I would call my little brother and ask in great detail about the objects he needed for school to show I wasn’t an employee at all.
I called my brother, didn’t tell him why I was calling him and the reasoning, and started asking stupid questions.
“what color of poster board do you need?”
“Oh so, you don’t want a bright pink one? Got something against pink?”
“Why are you calling me stupid? I’m not the one who forgot about a project!”
“what brand of markers do you want?………….yeah no fuck that that’s too expensive, you’re getting the dollar ones”
My little brother ended up hanging up on me. I tried to call him back, didn’t work. Ass hole sent me to voicemail and temporarily blocked me. I don’t blame him, I would block myself.
I decided to hold my phone up to my head and pretend to talk to somebody on the phone. It was working so far, but then I caught the eye of one woman.
Woman: EXCUSE ME!!!!!!
Woman: WHAT DID YOU SAY?! I CAN’T FIND MY SIZE IN THESES SHOES?!!!
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCK NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I literally took off in a separate direction hauling ass. However, I then ran face first into a giant cart for the store pick up orders. I fell over, hit my arm pretty good, the woman started yelling about something, I said “fuck, nope” again, got up, put the stuff back on the cart and then ran towards the cupcakes, with my cellphone still in hand pretending to talk to somebody on the phone.
I ran across the store with markers, a poster board, the poster board made it hard to run. I got the cupcakes, ran to the self-check out. I stood in line staring off into the distance pretending to not notice anybody. I checked out, ran to the closest exit and ran to my car like a mad person, with the poster board still making it hard to run.
I then drove to my moms house, burst in through the front door, ran up to my little brothers room and bursted into his room
Me: DON’T EVER FORGET ABOUT A PROJECT AGAIN
I threw the stuff at him, took a cupcake and ran back out to my car and drove home.
This is completely my fault, and I have learned to always keep a hoodie or a sweater in my car at all times in case I am wearing red and need to go back to that store.
I hope this made somebodies day.