As a 15-year-old Asian female, I feel so disgusted that I’ve said the n-word in the past. I learned those terms in modern rap music. When I said it with friends, I thought I was being funny and edgy, but in reality, it’s not. I’ve always had known the word was offensive but chose to say it to make them laugh. I’ve never hated black people or used the n-word in a serious way. Looking back at it, I feel extremely disgusted with myself. I’m not here to make any excuses because there are none. What matters here was that I said a derogatory term.
I’ve educated myself about racism and the dark history behind it. The n-word is not just a racial slur, it is a slur that triggers a long history of trauma. The word has a long history of racial discrimination and unfair treatment. Black people have gone through a lot of terrible things in the past and saying the word is just a reminder for them. I was beyond ignorant and dumb to say such a thing. I am extremely sorry for every black person who was called it. Words can describe how ashamed I am of my past behavior. I promised myself that I’ll never say it again.
I sincerely apologize to the black community for saying such a horrible word. I was absolutely wrong for saying it. As an Asian, I’ve been made fun of for my eyes and my accent and I understand how it is like to be discriminated against. I’ve understood the hurt I’ve caused. Whether it is in public or in private, this word is totally unacceptable. As of right now, I’ve been active on the lookout to help fight racism by donating, signing petitions, and protesting. I, 100% support the Black Lives Matter movement. I have black friends myself and they’re just like us, the only difference is skin color. The inner qualities such as personalities in human matters way more than looks. Not just for black people, but for all races. I hope one day our world will treat everyone the same regardless of their color